Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Different types of people (a servers nightmare)

Anyone who is a server at a resturaunt cannot say they dont judge. As soon as a table walks in, gaurenteed they decide which category you fit in, and then your level of service is decided from there...You are either:

The big spender: Your probably on your first date, or your trying to impress someone. If your going to order a ton of food, make sure you have the money for it..AND for a tip. When you get the bill you play it off like you have enough, but dont hand over your just-enough dollar bills and tell me to keep your change. Thanks for the 92 cents.

The family: You and your family come in for a nice dinner. You allow your kids to get water, you joke with your waitress about how no one tips in provo, order a large pizza for all 14 of your kids, and even though you mentioned poor tips in provo, you still fail to tip. Last I heard, its not 10 years ago, and a good tip isnt 10%.

The old people: This can go either way. If its two women out to eat, your screwed. Their small salad bars and water with lemon garuntees about a 1.00 tip. If its two men, it might go up to 2.00. If its a couple, and the man hands you the card your safe. If its the wife who is "budgeting" you're better off serving a squirrel.

The daters: Often this could go with the big spender--your tip goes up with age. Provo guys tend to try to impress their date, BUT she's not impressed and neither am I if you leave me 15%. Its better than nothing, but what will it hurt you to help out the poor starving college student serving you?

The Lunch crew: Lunch specials are stupid. We all know it. But if your table starts complaining about the high prices, you can always suggest easy mac or store bought pizza. No matter how much you complain the prices stay the same and your service will probably come down. But then you have the regulars---you know their order and they love it. They will usually tip well.

The normal: You cant decide whether they will be easy or not. So you give them great service. IT either pays off and you'll remember their face for the next time they come in-whether its becuase you warn all other servers about how much they suck, or that they are lucky.

The loner: You try to be as nice as possible, becuase they are alone in a resturaunt. Sit and have a great meal, but if you sit and do your crosswords, sudoku, or read the paper for hours on end, i will kill you. I dont live at the joint and i dont want to stay while you figure out what the extension of a right angle is for 6 down. I dont care, and no one will check your puzzle anyway.

Anyway, im sure i missed some. But just know your being judged.:)

2 comments:

Ashlee said...

hahahahaha.
YES! I love this so much!

Unknown said...

I loved that!! and it is completely true! the only difference is that it's not only in Utah that no one tips.I have never worked as a server here in Utah but I have in NY and they are just as stingy! I LOVE YOU!